Wednesday, 6 July 2016

#TumultuousPink Part of A Journey with Mindfulness

Sod’s Law or Murphy’s?  I am writing this post on day 3 while away on a Mindfulness ‘Finding Peace in a Frantic World’ training residential in the middle of nowhere.  I somehow missed the email that said, No Internet Access; and, now sitting down to write this post, it also seems like there will be no power access either-the lights have just gone out in our 6th form dormitory single rooms with shared toilet and showers.  I have had to take a short breathing space to gather my thoughts as I had not really planned for any challenges over the next 100 posts-and wham! 
So, I have made a deal with myself.  I will write the posts each day and send them when and if I can before my return home this coming Saturday.  Ahh…the lights have just returned.  My topic for today’s post was going to be around journeys-but, now I am not so certain where my stream of consciousness will take me. 
I am a teacher of Drama and Psychology and a firm believer in the power of the mind’s ability to change the brain to change the mind.  It was a long journey for me to arrive at this destination of thought.  I have OCD-Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and just like all of the other conditions that make me who I am, I am not ashamed of it.  I don’t have the compulsion to clean or fear of touching others-no, indeed, I am quite a touchy feeling person.  I do have the compulsion to check things, the door, the curling iron, the electric sockets…but, more than anything else, I ruminate on thoughts that others would just wave away.  I have been known to avoid writing cards or signing leavers books because I worry I would tell someone to f*** off without even knowing.  I also had to stop my brief dalliance with  cigarettes because I was convinced the lighter would somehow magically light the cigarette while I was asleep; this was after dowsing the cigarette butt in water and checking a hundred times to make sure it was truly out.   In order to manage this condition, I looked into Mindfulness and it opened my mind up to the possibility of freedom from debilitating thoughts.
Fast forward to today and I am grateful to be part of a three professional teacher team training to bring Mindfulness to our young people.  I am excited to give them the tools to stop, ground themselves in the very moment they are in and pause to listen to their own breath, heart beat and coach them to be aware of being alive. I could write a great deal about Mindfulness, and I am happy to if you wish. Otherwise, a quick Google will give you a lot of info to start with.  What it isn’t is, ‘Arty Farty’ or ‘Airy Fairy’-it is grounded in research using Scientific testing methods.  But beleive me, it is also based on qualitative accounts-like my struggle today to connect. 

So, I guess this post is something about Journey’s-I am still waiting to connect to the internet so I can post-isn’t it funny, how much we take for granted the very simple act of being able to connect to the internet-but, today I feel it has actually more about being able to connect with others.  I have felt cut off and you know, I want to talk to my husband, check in and let him know I made it to my destination.
Well, my Glamazons, I have managed to finally get a window of connection-I will post this on day 3!  Hallelujah!  In the end today has taught me that though life can be tumultuous-I am wearing my Estee Lauder #tumultuouspink in honor of the day-it is all a part of our individual journeys in life-and having some tools to cope (Mindfulness) makes it that much more bearable. So much to talk about in the days to come, but until tomorrow-peace out.

Love on Day 3,

Leila

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